There are many great writers on this site with many different styles opinions and personas. The goal of this post it to link which personal from each staff member to a WWE superstar, or professional "rassler".
I have been a member of this great site for about 3 years, seen folks come and go and got accustom to how each of the staff members write, and more importantly how the commentators or "fans" react to them. Here is the list of the BE staff paired with what WWE entity which best relates to them.
(Disclaimer – this post is strictly for fun and I hope I do not offend any of the staff which would lead to my demise via ban hammer)
Kid Nate:
He is the creator and rules win an Iron fist. I was tempted to put in Johnny Ace but Nate's power is too absolute.
Brent Brookhouse:
2nd in command , heir to the throne and can still deliver in ring.
Matt Bishop:
The voice of BE and always plugs sponsors on cue.
Tim Burke:
One of the best workers on the roster and comes off as crazy.
KJ Gould:
A grappling guru well versed in submissions who has worked his way up through the ranks to the big times.
Leland Roling:
He is able to deliver in the ring with technique and knows how to work the crowd with controversy.
Dallas Winston:
The most bizarre member of the roster. (who is fantastic)
Matt Roth:
Nobody gets more heat on BE than Roth, so its only fitting he is linked to the biggest heel in the WWE.
The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.
13 recs | 154 comments
Fuck.
I think I’m more of a Santino.
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
Yeah, cuz he sucks!
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Excuse ME!?
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
The sympathetic comedy character
If that’s not me, then I don’t even know. I’m no longer a heel.
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
You’ve got X-Pac heat homie.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Roth is sub-Doink level. He’s not even Dink… he’s Pink.
smoogy2 - February 20, 2012
Roth is the Brooklyn Brawler.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
He is...
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Roth is obviously
IRodC - February 20, 2012
You guys are dicks.
I’m at least as good as
GLACIER!!!!
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
Nope. You are Mortis.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
I'll accept that. Chris Kanyon 4 EVER!
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
WHO BETTER THAN CABBAGE?!
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
EVERYBODY!
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
festus
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
I remember that guy.
Too bad he couldn’t shoot frost blasts at his enemies like sub- zero…
ElliotMatheny - February 20, 2012
It's also bad that he couldn't wrestle either
IRodC - February 20, 2012
BAHAHA this is great.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Great at ruining MMA.
Zachary Kater - February 20, 2012
ITS TIME, ITS TIME....
Highlight - February 20, 2012
I call Rick Rude
Circa 1990
LUKE THOMAS IS NOTHING BUT A PUTRID PAINTYWAIST. A STINKING SWAMP SOW, WITH BREATH LIKE AN OVERUSED BARF BUCKET!
smoogy2 - February 20, 2012
If Luke could be serious for a minuet
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
BOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!
MicahtheCynic - February 20, 2012
I was about to make that comparison my self.
Balrog - February 20, 2012
God, I loved Lance Storm.
Great match w/ Jericho at One Night Stand.
SanFranpsycho - February 20, 2012
i cant see who dallas is its not coming up who is he?
benten20 - February 20, 2012 via mobile
Goldust.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
that....is perfect
benten20 - February 20, 2012 via mobile
surprisingly I see how it all fits together
somewhere Luke Thomas Beard twitched in agony
MaZZacare - February 20, 2012
If Bishop is Cole, then Hemminger is:
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Shucky ducky quack quack
Matt Bishop - February 20, 2012
Shucky ducky quack quack = Wicky wild, wicky wicky wild.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Also, our esteemed moderators?
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Well played
LRaunThaDamaja - February 20, 2012
Bullshit
If anything, I’m Sabu. I show up randomly, use ridiculous amounts of weaponry (gifs), technically sound almost never, but dammit I know how to clear out a fucking ring…err…post.
Damon O. - February 20, 2012
+1 good sir
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
+2
Best of all time!!
Hart Thorson - February 22, 2012
Right to censor, worlds most diabolical cockblocks and killjoys.
Hendo_One-Shot - February 20, 2012
Front page this shit.
( . Y . ) - February 20, 2012
Honorable mention
MDB is the Funkasaurs
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
I better get Johnny Ace.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Somebody call his momma
..so awesome
warren305 - February 20, 2012
alternative for Brent
Our Bovine Public - February 20, 2012
Mike Fagan
[image redacted]
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
Mike Fagan: Had a major falling out with the higher-ups, makes shoots on Twitter to speak out against BE.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Rec Worthy
MMA42 - February 20, 2012
Holy shit, this is golden.
Kaleb Kelchner - February 20, 2012
Snowden is The Rock
Left BE for greener pastures. Still comes around to plug his ventures…?
warren305 - February 20, 2012
Nah he's more of a Bischoff
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
Ouch..hope Nate isn't looking
warren305 - February 20, 2012
sold out WCW to go NWO
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
Dude, he's clearly Vince Russo
Watch BR wither and die.
KJ Gould - February 20, 2012
Not sure if that works, considering the fate of MMA Nation, which is playing the role of the WWF/E here.
And Vince Russo needs to be someone that Mike Fagan hates with a bitter passion, since he’s Jim Cornette and everything. lol
Kaleb Kelchner - February 20, 2012
MMA Nation merging with MMA Fighting is WWWF becoming WWF
Buying up the regionals and becoming an international monster.
KJ Gould - February 21, 2012
Alright, I dig it. If Snowden is Russo, I’m Kevin Nash or Scott Hall.
Nash, the iffy worker that gets in with the right stable, makes money. I’d have no qualms with the comparison. lol
Kaleb Kelchner - February 21, 2012
Would have been great with the names of the wrestling stars for those of us who don’t follow it, and maybe some further explanation. I only recognize Vince McMahon :(
But I guess it’s more aimed towards WWE fans, so maybe the jokes on us.
Horselover Fat - February 20, 2012
Yep, thay seem to have fun but other than McMahon I have no idea who the hell these people are.
Sweet Scientist - February 20, 2012
they*
Sweet Scientist - February 20, 2012
Yeah..
The only one I got so far was Golddust. My Prowrestling died at the age of 12
Fistbeard - February 20, 2012 via mobile
I can’t imagine that even knowing who many of the others are would help if you don’t follow wrestling at all. The Brookhouse one is HHH, who you may be familar with. Leland’s is frequent VH1 talking head Chris Jericho.
Fraser Coffeen - February 20, 2012
Bishop is Michael Cole – Pretty much WWE’s Mike Goldberg except more annoying
Burke is R-Truth – He is very athletic and goes on nonsensical rants
KJ is Bryan Danielson – A guy that came up from the independent scene and a lot of his moves are submissions
Dallas is goldust – A very bizarre individual (as you can see by the picture)
Roth is Vicky Guerrero, a woman with a very annoying voice that everyone seems to hate
IRodC - February 20, 2012
Cool, thanks!
Horselover Fat - February 20, 2012
Had to go check out Goldust on youtube, looks like a pretty damn awesome character from what little I’ve seen. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1hK-oxxiE8
Horselover Fat - February 20, 2012
He’s fun. Also a fun little fact if you’re an old school wrasslin- fan – he’s actually legitimately the son of Dusty Rhodes.
Fraser Coffeen - February 20, 2012
and this
Our Bovine Public - February 20, 2012
Who gets to be these folks?
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
This is probably the closest you'll get to me and burke besides the Dudleys.
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
Edge and Christian! 5 second pose!
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
This is a photo of Burke, Fagan, and Me
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
You and Fagan resemble Bubba Ray and Spike quite strikingly. And Burke is a dead-ringer for D’Von obviously.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Better fit
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Best fit.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
BANNED! : )
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
The bigger issue here is who would be Rico?
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
not quite as good as yours
19Miles - February 20, 2012
DAY-UM!
Matthew Roth - February 20, 2012
Thapa
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
psychoblack, S.C. Michaelson, AfroSamurai, and rampage01
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
psychoblack, S.C. Michaelson, AfroSamurai, and rampage01
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
That's raci....accurate?
Damon O. - February 20, 2012
mmaintellegence
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
you sir are on a roll
19Miles - February 20, 2012
gtfo
regal was a bawse
Cunny - February 21, 2012
nottheface aka John Nash aka
IRodC - February 20, 2012
Genius
RockyBullwinkel - February 20, 2012
Forrest Lynn
IRodC - February 20, 2012
Anton
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
who's that?
I don’t get it. haha.
Anton Tabuena - February 21, 2012
LaParka
the CHAIRmen of wcw
Thats It For you! - February 21, 2012
Yea, you failed on that one, haha
Damon O. - February 21, 2012
I think this is a suitable wrestler for our Mods
Anton Tabuena - February 21, 2012
Dude it's a compliment
La Parka was the shit back in the day.
Chromium - February 25, 2012
Christ you guys are lame.
lowellthehammer - February 20, 2012
Get stuffed.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Be a star, Lowell.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Speaking of Lowellthehammer
MicahtheCynic - February 20, 2012
Believable as a self portrait based on your user photo.
lowellthehammer - February 20, 2012
I’d ask who pissed in your cheerios, but I know his name is Carlos Condit.
MicahtheCynic - February 20, 2012
Me
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
No, since you are at Gal's Guide you are more like this
IRodC - February 20, 2012
FROM PLANET STASIAK!
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
I am laughing out loud reading these comments.
You guys are funny.
KatGirl - February 20, 2012
Ben Saunders and Josh Samman would make this epic tag team.
mountaineers101 - February 20, 2012
Cena
We’re missing him…and Ziggler. Also, I’d like to think Snowden would be Punk. Most of what he says causes some sort of controversy.
MMA42 - February 20, 2012
Snowden also gets the biggest amount of hate, thus:
MicahtheCynic - February 20, 2012
Snowden always draws Xpac heat
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ - February 23, 2012
Subo is...
IRodC - February 20, 2012
…Teddy Hart.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Gregory Helms
Kaleb Kelchner - February 20, 2012
All these guys made it to the WWE though. I went with Teddy Hart because he has potential, but his big mouth and lack of work has got him fired from everywhere.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
I know, Teddy Hart is a good one. I went with Helms because he’s an underachiever and the substance abuse.
That, and it’s funny picturing Subo as the Hurricane.
Kaleb Kelchner - February 20, 2012
LOL actually that’s a pretty good call after the explanation.
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
Val Venis?
MMA42 - February 20, 2012
Undertaker?
think about it, Subo never stays banned, Undertaker never stays dead….
darkotto23 - February 21, 2012
This is so good it hurts. Bravo gentlemen.
Kaleb Kelchner - February 20, 2012
TOO
Many LOLz in this thread. Good show!
xFenixKnightx - February 20, 2012
Mobile rec to everything about this post and comment section.
Chris Hall - February 20, 2012 via Android app
Absolutely not.
Zachary Kater - February 20, 2012
There's something wrong with you
Chris Hall - February 21, 2012
Pro wrestling fans- you absolutely suck, etc
ElliotMatheny - February 21, 2012
It’s odd that Chael’s shtick doesn’t bug me even though I hate pro wrestling.
Zachary Kater - February 21, 2012
It doesn't bug me,
and sometimes it’s entertaining. But I do think that his mouth gets him opportunities that he doesn’t always objectively earn.
ElliotMatheny - February 21, 2012
His last post-fight "interview" was horrible though.
Chris Hall - February 22, 2012
Yeah, it fell way flat for me.
He should’ve had a back- up speech, in the event that he didn’t blow the doors off of Bisping. Because he barely squeaks past Mike, and then talks like he’s the baddest motherfucker on the planet, and i’m just thinking… “Yeah right. Not after that performance you aren’t.”
ElliotMatheny - February 22, 2012
Pretty much. It's one thing to shock everyone against the #1 P4P fighter in the world,
it’s another to barely get by a questionable top 10 MW you were supposed to dominate.
sun yue - February 22, 2012
Bisping got the better end of the deal IMO by not having to fight Spider.
Might as well sharpen his skills up some more and hope for age to finally catch up with Anderson before fighting him.
Zachary Kater - February 22, 2012
Fighting for the title would've made Bisping's career, though.
Because I honestly don’t think he ever WILL be the champ.
ElliotMatheny - February 22, 2012
It's kind of funny how Sonnen rejuvenated his career with a loss
and now Bisping’s done the same. He definitely came out looking better than Sonnen did. I can’t say I agree that not getting a title shot was better for him. It’d be a huge moment for him and a devastating loss to Silva wouldn’t set him, or pretty much any MW other than Sonnen, back.
sun yue - February 22, 2012
Burke is certainly explosive and athletic.
but when did Adam Lambert join WWE?
Victor Rodriguez - February 20, 2012
So glad nobody’s gone with the “Thapa is [deaf wrestler]” idea.
I don’t even know if there’s ever been a deaf wrestler or someone who uses something like it as a shtick.
Ben Thapa - February 20, 2012
that's Matt Hammill
get you MMA out of pro wrestling!
Thats It For you! - February 20, 2012
I was gonna go with Triple H
Because his promos are so long you have to divide them in 5 parts to make any sense of em.
IRodC - February 20, 2012
Oh my.
Ben Thapa - February 20, 2012
All you guys are idiots
Fagan is Bret Hart
Mike Rome is Shawn Michaels (5-star matches/articles)
Nick Thomas is Dean Malenko
Roth is The Miz
And I’m Stone Cold.
Anthony Pace - February 20, 2012 via mobile
Pretty clear who you are - the middle one
Tim Burke - February 20, 2012
im just glad you didnt post a pick of Otunga
Harvard can eat a dick
Anthony Pace - February 21, 2012 via mobile
Bret Hart was the greatest technical wrestler I ever saw.
His hour-long match with Shawn Michaels is still my favorite match of all time.
I stopped watching when I turned 14. Judging by these photos, I picked a good time to get out.
Forbidden Psychological Technology - February 21, 2012 via mobile
brett hart screwed brett hart
HBK is the greatest performer of all time
Kronic - February 22, 2012
While I don't necessarily agree, I can see how to make that argument.
His ladder matches against Razor Ramon were epic.
Forbidden Psychological Technology - February 22, 2012
I love this whole thing.
The Billy and Chuck reference was enough to make me legitimately laugh out loud
Sonnens Political Adviser - February 20, 2012
I'll just leave this
here …
KJ Gould - February 20, 2012
who are me, Chris90210 and BV???
Earl Montclair - February 20, 2012
This is you Earl
Chris 90210 and BV are
STRIKEFORCE
IRodC - February 20, 2012
Hilarious
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ - February 21, 2012
I have 0 idea who most of these people are
II SMASH II - February 20, 2012
Who am I?
I am awesome
Andy Anderson - February 21, 2012
Kwee Wee
IRodC - February 21, 2012
wha?????
I don’t like this game anymore….
Andy Anderson - February 22, 2012
Bizarre? Really?
I’m a little surprised that’s my consensus description. I don’t see it.
Dallas Winston - February 22, 2012
P.S. Just kidding
Dallas Winston - February 22, 2012
V funny posts. Good way of circumventing the 'no personal insults' ban.
I kinda had this bad mental image if most of the commenters here b4 that unveiling of faces thread a little back
UK MMA MAN - February 24, 2012
Then you found out
we are as attractive as Jake Shields
Andy Anderson - February 24, 2012
Is that better or worse?
UK MMA MAN - February 24, 2012
Depends
It is 80% better in the North of England
Andy Anderson - February 24, 2012
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